Every April, and I‘m speaking for the Northern Hemisphere, I lose an hour of sleep, compliments of Daylight Savings Time. It's the weekend, so no one really cares. People are just confused and panicky the next couple of days because their watches don't match their computer clocks, the bank clock is still wrong, and everyone thinks he’s an hour late for botany lab. It's a lot like playing God, messing with the time continuum like that and more than likely one day when we switch the clocks at 2am existence will accidentally be destroyed.

I find it fitting that this falls near the end of the school semester when it's most convenient to be losing that extra sleep and study time. At the same time, I suppose if it weren't taken away from us for the good of inconveniencing our pale, black-cloaked friends, we'd find another way to waste that hour, whether it be by reading a PETA pamphlet, adopting a highway or simply staying home and watching Oprah. In all honesty, it's when they try to make up for lost time that things are illogical and irksome.

Every October they ("they") return our hour of sleep, and you know what? No one wants an extra hour of sleep on a Sunday morning! Why in the world would they ("they") think we need it? So we can sleep in a little bit before going to 6am mass? It's the weekend! WE ARE ALREADY SLEEPING IN! Even if you are the church-going type (and I can include myself in this category so don‘t get uppity), an extra hour is not going to help you stay awake during the sermon. Only snorting coke will do that, but in my experience cokeheads aren't usually the religious-sorts. Also, everyone just stays up or out an hour later because "Oh, I get an extra hour of sleep tonight!". No you don't, jackass, because now you binge-drank yourself into an extra hour's worth of a recovery-time-coma and you're really going to sleep the same amount you always do since you stayed out later so you'll feel even worse than you did last weekend when you wake up. Oh, and you're pregnant now.

If we all feel the need to change the time every 6 months, why can't we make it a different day of the week? Losing an hour on Sunday is okay I guess, but I'd rather reserve it for any day when Armor for Sleep might be opening for my favorite band so I won't have to say "I wish I had that hour of my life back". Or when we find ourselves at a social gathering that is best described as humdrum and don't want to be there, but we are the ones that drove. Maybe when dad is giving the condoms talk, or if we accidentally pay to see a Will Smith movie. Just skip the hour for now, and get it back in six months! Make certain it falls on a Wednesday or Thursday, though, because those are hard on all of us.

On that note, I'm going to go take a one-hour nap.

-jen